The Tough Days

Oh, the tough days.  They are rare. Few and far between but when they hit, they come on strong.  The days when I look at the clock and see it is only 8:30 and wonder how we're going to make it till bedtime.  Honestly, I think we've only had two days like this since I started staying home.  One was a few weeks in and today was the second.

A lot of it is due to bad timing.  I'm fighting a cold and Asher is teething, possibly fighting the same cold, and exhausted from a weekend of fun and minimal naps.  The sad thing is, when he is happy, he is the happiest, funniest 15-month-old you've ever met.  But when things get out of whack... he doesn't handle it well.  And it's hard on all of us.  Poor Avery runs to another room, almost in tears, telling me "mommy, he's hurting my ears, make him stop crying."  I feel equally bad for both of them.  She's left to fend for herself while I spend the day trying to soothe him.  I know it's just a phase and it will pass soon but today I felt so hopeless as a parent. It's amazing the contradiction of emotions you can feel as a parent.  The unconditional love is something fierce.  Something that you really aren't prepared for until you see your child for the first time.  But some days are just long and test your patience more than you imagined possible.  And sadly, sometimes you fail. Today, I failed.   I was short-tempered and frustrated and didn't show him the compassion he deserved.

But we go on, and thankfully he is quick to forgive me of my shortcomings. His sly smile and big hugs melt my heart in a way I never knew possible.  He's my little guy and we will always make it through the hard days. I know as he gets older these days will become less and less.  But so will his hugs and cuddles.

So, after the hardest day I've had in quite a while, I rocked my baby to sleep and savored every sweet moment of his cuddles.  He gave me the sweetest little half-smile as he lost the battle to keep his heavy lids open and drifted off to sleep.  That short moment more than made up for the screaming.  Tonight, as I say my prayers I will certainly ask God for more grace then I hand out, and for wisdom to handle the tough days.   To be the best mother to each of my children and the best wife to my husband.  Because days like this only confirm my beliefs that I can't do this on my own.  That I need a merciful and compassionate God who is full of forgiveness and grace.  To shower his mercy on me and help me grow into the parent and wife my family needs.

Life Lately

We've been the perfect kind of busy lately... Busy enough to keep the kids entertained and make the days go by quickly but not to busy to feel overwhelmed or exhausted.  Just how I like it! 

Typically, the kids wake up between 7(Avery) and 8(Asher) and we have a relaxing morning eating breakfast, playing, or going for a walk. I love having something fun planned from 10-12ish because it's just the perfect time for us to get out.  We don't feel rushed to get out the door and then we're home for lunch and nap time.  By the time the kids (usually just Asher) wake up, it's 3:00ish and it's time to start thinking about dinner or filling up the pool to play outside for a bit.  It's really amazing how fast the days pass and how busy we always seem to be!!

Here is a quick long recap of some of our recent fun:

Asher loves to do somersaults.  The only problem... he can't do them alone.  So he positions himself like this and yells for me until I come flip him over.  We do this at least a dozen times a day.  He.is.hilarious. 

He also loves the water and is a quick climber.  Can't turn my back for a second!

Avery is still refusing to nap (unless I lay down with her and stay in her bed until she falls asleep).  She always manages to keep herself entertained during quiet time though.  She "cleaned" her room with baby powder recently... such a good helper!!

This little guy has learned to through EPIC tantrums.  I can't help but laugh (and take pictures).  I'm so thankful Avery wasn't like this... I probably would have cried. A lot.  But thankfully I'm a little more laid back now... 

He also loves being outside. And naked.

 This kid is TROUBLE!

We love popsicle time while brother sleeps!!

Matt and I try to make the most of nap time during the weekends!

She still loves to play momma.  And is quite good at it :) 

 Someone learned to say "cheese!"

Avery loves puzzles and worked so hard to do this one all by herself! She was so proud!

Buddies 

Cheese!!

Avery had a wonderful time at VBS two weeks ago! I'm so glad she went! I helped out a few days and it was fun to watch her learning about Jesus and playing with her sweet friends!

Enjoying a little frozen yogurt after the last day of VBS!

 Date night pic with my favorite guy :)

Nothing says Texas like a private concert out in the country.  It was awesome!!

 Love this lady!

Happy Father's Day to the best daddy!! Our children are so blessed to have a father who is always willing to get down on the floor and play with them.  Who would do anything for them.  Who always makes time to do special things with them.  We love you!!

Oh, these sweet friends.  I hope Avery is always lucky enough to be blessed with great friendships. 

 Play date with the Erwins!

Scary to see this little girl driving! She will be 16 before I know it!

We eat a lot of popsicles! 

I found these two hiding in my shower while I was cooking dinner.  I love how Asher is looking at her... he sure loves his big sis!! I'm sure they will get into a lot of trouble together in the next few years!

June so far

We've had the most mild spring in North Texas and it's been so nice to actually enjoy being outside. 

One of my best friends from elementary school up through high school was in Texas with her family and I'm so glad they were able to stop by and spend some time with us before heading back to Colorado.  Our kids had so much fun playing together. 

These three were so cute and insisted on all sitting on the same side of the table. 

Avery loved playing with Heather.  I think she would love having a little sister! 

These two are TROUBLE!! They had a great time and Heather may or may not have given Asher his first kiss.  Adorable. 

I'm so thankful that after all these years we can just pick up like we see each other all the time.   There is something so special about a friend who has known you almost your whole life and seen you through the good times and the bad. 

We're looking forward to seeing them again next month in Colorado!! 

Today we took the kids to Joe Pool Lake.  We were having an off morning and needed  to get out of the house and stop the crying/whining.  A free lake 2 miles from home seemed like the perfect solution!

I was surprised how few people were there and the water wasn't too cold! We had a great time. 

Asher loves the water.  He is our little fish and has no fear at all! 

We've enjoyed many evenings in the back yard grilling, playing in the water and relaxing.  I'm pretty sure things are going to really heat up now that its the middle of June so our time outside may be limited but we've sure enjoyed this beautiful spring! 

Enjoy the Little Things

I'm all about small moments right now.  The little memories that make big impacts.  There are so many times during the day when I "have" to take a picture because I don't want to forget the silly, sweet, messy, or crazy things that make up my days.

I know I'm on my phone too much and Matt is always teasing me about my Instagram obsession but I love pictures and I love having real life pictures of my kids instead of only posed smiles.  I love yummy dinners and wonderful "me time" breaks at Target.   I love caffeine and coffee and crafting and I love having pictures of all the things I love.  So, it may seem silly but I feel the need to take 10-20 pictures every single day.  And often times more. Yes, that may seem obsessive and over-the-top but I love it!