Monday, October 17, 2011

The Second Time Around

Matt and I have always wanted our kids to be close in age – ideally two to two and a half years apart. Knowing that this is often out of our control I thought if we started trying early we’d have a better chance of making it work. So we agreed that when Avery was about 15 months old we’d start trying for number two which would put them almost two years apart. I assumed it would take a few months and maybe after trying for a bit we’d get the good news we were hoping for. After the first month I read the directions on the EPT test and it said you could take it as soon as one day after your missed period. Even though I did not have any pregnancy symptoms and was certain it would come back negative I decided to give it a try. For the second time we both stared in shock and amazement when that little blue line appeared. I could not believe how fast it happened. It’s funny how even though we were trying this time it was still such a shock!

It was still so early, I figured I couldn’t be more than four weeks along, so we decided to wait a couple weeks to tell anyone – even our families. It just didn’t seem real. I felt normal. No nausea, no fatigue, no nothing. Well, I’m terrible at keeping secrets (when they’re mine) so I told a few people that I knew wouldn’t tell anyone. Phew, it felt good to share my news and made things seem a little more real.

I started planning fun and creative way to tell family and friends. I bought this cute little shirt for Avery to wear to “announce” her big news! I planned on taking her picture and sending it to our families to surprise them. Leave it to my mom to ruin my plans though (love you mom!)) I was talking to her on the phone and mentioned just once that I was tired and didn’t have much energy. Her first response – YOU’RE NOT PREGNANT, ARE YOU??. Well, I had already taken the picture of Avery, was ready to mail it out the next day. So I quickly said, “no!” About 30 seconds later I spilled the beans to her and my dad. After that the secret was definitely out but I wasn’t ready to ‘publicly’ announce it.

We had our first sonogram September 28th and confirmed that the baby was healthy and everything looked normal. It felt was so good to finally see the little peanut and hear the heartbeat.

My doctor also sat down with us and talked about precautions and preventative measures we will take this time around to try and prevent the complications I had last time. Starting at 15 weeks I will have a weekly injection called Step17. It is a modified hormone that has been shown to decrease preterm labor symptoms in women who experienced them with their first pregnancy. I was really concerned I’d have to be on blood thinners the whole time as well but thankfully I’m just taking baby Aspirin for now. I have an appointment coming up with the Hematologist to learn more about measures we will take to keep my blood from clotting.

Here I am at 10 weeks. Just barely starting to show. It amazes me how much earlier you show with the second. I don’t think I noticed any changes when I was pregnant with Avery until about 20 weeks. I guess I’ll get more use out of my maternity clothes this time around. Yay… :)  I am definitely working on a nice little baby bump now… I have a feeling I’ll be breaking out the belly band very soon.

Its funny how things can be so different, yet very much the same the second time around. My symptoms are similar to when I was pregnant with Avery (no morning sickness, decreased appetite, and fatigue in the evenings). Yet last time I was blissfully ignorant. I had no concerns of bed rest or blood clots or preterm labor. You never expect things to go wrong. This time though, I’d be lying if I said these concerns never cross my mind. I’m trying really hard to take it one day and a time and trust God’s plan but I catch myself constantly checking my ankles to make sure there is no swelling, worrying every time I have a stomach ache, worrying that I will overexert myself and cause the contractions to start again. Ugh, I hate worrying about it all but I am doing my best to drink lots of water, go for walks as often as possible, and just push it to the back of my mind.

The second time around is also different because I now truly understand how much we will love this little baby. With Avery, everyone told me how wonderful it would be, how she would change our lives forever. I thought I understood but until I held her in my arms for the first time I really didn’t get it. I didn’t understand the all-consuming love you feel for a helpless little baby you’ve just met. And how that love grows. Every time you think your heart just may burst right out of your chest a little giggle or smile and you find even more love in an already full heart.

We’re having fun picking out names. I think this little peanut is a boy. No real reason for this, just a gut feeling. We have a growing name list and I think it will be much harder to decide this time – whether it’s a girl or a boy!

Hope you had a fantastic weekend!

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