A year ago your daddy and I sat in the hospital room and stared in awe and wonder at our newborn daughter. We had no idea what we were getting ourselves into – no idea how to handle a newborn’s crying, or to bathe a 2 week-old, neither of us had even changed a newborn’s diaper!! But more than anything else, we had no idea how deeply and unconditionally we would love you. We had no idea that your first smile would rock our worlds or that your sweet voice would be music to our ears, even at 6:00 am on a Saturday morning. We didn’t have a clue as to the depth of our love for you.
We also didn’t understand how quickly you would grow and change. It’s funny, everyone told us this would happen but I don’t think it’s possible to fully comprehend until you have a child of your own. Looking back through pictures, I’m fairly certain that you gained two pounds and grew three inches in the course of a week. And each time you accomplished a new milestone I felt a conflicting surge of joy along with a dull ache in my heart. Joy that you were learning and growing, as a momma there is nothing more blissful than experiencing the big firsts – first smile, first time rolling over, sitting up, crawling, walking, etc. We would celebrate and clap and make a big commotion… I’m sure you already think we are nuts. But somewhere deep down was this ache because with each new milestone and accomplishment you changed and I even though I was excited for you, I was so in love with the stage you were in, I wasn’t ready to give it up just yet.
Today is your first birthday. As the doctor so kindly reminded me, you are not a baby anymore, you are a toddler. Luckily, I’m not listening. You will always be my baby and I will always cherish the first time I held your little 6 pound 12 ounce body.
What a privilege and blessing it is to be your mommy.
I love you monkey!